Lingbo Li
All Chinese [parties] look alike
Chinese gatherings are all alike; every other party is unique in its own way. Chinese parties, by and large, contain several essential elements: a gut-busting family-style meal, dishes with ingredients cut into small pieces, heart-wrenchingly awful karaoke (because this is the socially acceptable way to display emotion), rice liquor and/or Chinese beer, possibly crappy wine. And Chinese people. These are not optional.
growing up at the table
At the advanced age of 21, I finally seemed to have graduated to the Big Kids tables at these kinds of gatherings. Someone offered me alcohol, but I realized I wanted no part of tipsy festivities. “Your Chinese is superb,” another guest complimented me after I said the equivalent of, “I interned in Shanghai this summer.” I accepted the compliment ungraciously.
red-cooked pork, lined with a sunburst of halved hardboild eggs.
After munching through red-cooked pork and and thousand year old eggs, I realized the real party was where I could speak my unabashed dialect of sarcastic English. I shifted to the kitchen, where the high schoolers were.
A ton of homemade Chinese food porn after the jump.
How to pick a date restaurant
The question I get asked most often is: “Where should I take my romantic interest on a date?”
this cup runneth over with romance
When you ask me this, I secretly congratulate you on “dating.” The media often presents a rather skewed vision of college life, with claims of “rainbow parties” in middle school (I thought rainbows were the things that came after rainstorms) and incessant “hookup culture.”
I’m not convinced that things are really any different. I hear about coffee dates all the time. If romance is dead, the need to mutually self-coffeinate is not. As you get older, coffee becomes booze.
But the principle remains.
There’s obviously no simple answer to the original question. A few relevant considerations: what’s the occasion? What’s your budget? Dietary restrictions? Willingness to travel? For the purposes of this post, I’ll discuss first date options here.
Vote on where I should drop $$$ on food in NYC
You once wore the keys off your Blackberry trying to get that trolloped-up tramp-stamped trailer trash voted off Reality Show Whatever. Why not dedicate your sadistic key pressing towards a more worthy mission than the satisfaction of seeing if plastic can produce tears? Why not, in fact, give valuable input into where I should be spending my hard-earned money made hostessing?
“I feel kind of like a stripper,” I confessed to the other hostess as we counted up the day’s earnings in coat check tips – $80, almost entirely in singles. Indeed, there are many parallels to be (lovingly) drawn, the most obvious of which are the dollar dollar bills that are scraped off and counted up at the end of a shift. As you see, dear reader, in addition to assessing Twitter strategy, I’ve spending an awful lot of my time recording dinner reservations, pointing people towards the bathroom (end of the hallway to your left) and memorizing a seating chart. It’s been a valuable way to see how this whole thing runs – and practice my coat-hanging prowess.
I’ve learned that the restaurant biz is not for the faint of heart or the sore of foot. Wear comfortable shoes!
Anyway, I’m planning on ONE blowout meal this month to celebrate. Where should I go?
I wish I had Per Se on this list, but I think a $275 prix fixe is slightly out of my means. Ohhh well.
Lingbo discovered some Russian eats at New Year’s party
Here’s my friend and I, ready for New Year’s. I was fueled by yet another home run lunch at Crabtree’s Kittle House: salmon on a bed of lentils, preceded by a juicy, colorful lobster roll and homemade potato chips.
Lobster roll, with mango and avocado
I can’t say that the pelmeni (Russian dumplings) were blew the Chinese version out of the park, but since I skipped dinner, I found the salami, cheese, and mini pickles bizarrely alluring, and in true starved foodie fashion, wolfed down a plate of appetizers.
“It looks like the vacuum cleaner arrived,” another guest commented as I furiously shoved handfuls of potato crisps and cheese-globbed crackers into my mouth. I ignored him and helped myself to more salami slices. Dipped in sour cream. Oh my gosh. Everything just tasted amazing since I was so hungry.
- me and some horseradish sauce, salami, cheese, and a mini pickle… Russian?
Food porn: ricotta gnudi, sweet 100 tomatoes, nicoise crumble, petite basil
Lunch, when you’re working at the Kittle House, is a daily treat. They call it the family meal, and everyone sits down with an entree of choice to relax in the middle of a shift. Like a smattering of earth, crumbled olives are sprinkled over sweet 100 tomatoes and an unusual preparation of gnudi, which means nude in Italian. Normally gnocchi’s lighter, creamier cousin – made of ricotta, sometimes spinach, and akin to ravioli minus the doughy exterior – this gnudi is made by steeping ricotta balls in sorghum flour overnight, then fishing out the delicious results. Pregnant, newly clothed, and adorned with basil, and roundness echoed in the tomatoes, they’re creamy, indulgent, and oh-so-photogenic.
Lana Lingbo Li
I'm a world traveler / enthusiastic eater who's now blogging and producing videos over at HelloLana.com. Visit me there!
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